Where Is My Copy Of The Gay Agenda?

During the 1990’s I remember when gay equality was for many in the LGBT community was an in-depth secretive discussion. In fact, there was still the onset fear of being openly identified as gay or lesbian that many gay dance clubs or establishments wouldn’t open its doors until after 11PM. Many gay men wouldn’t show up until later knowing that heterosexuals were safely tucked away in their beds. Gay men would reverse park their cars to shield license plates being easily identified, and military base decals were obscured with tape or cardboard to hide from military police. After an evening of dancing and entertainment between gay members would suddenly end when Donna Summer’s hit “, Last Dance” was played. It marked the bar was closing, and the end of gay-themed fun would quickly resort back toward heterosexually-based demeanors and acting abilities of a straight-laced society.

The days of the gay bar seem long gone or appear to become mainstream leaving many in the LGBT community without an identity to call its own. When President Trump signed FOSTA (Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act), you might as well shot the heart out of the gay community. This is not to imply that gay men are prostitutes. Instead, it suggests that gay men used many adult-themed personal websites to meet one another.  Gay men, having few remaining outlets to seek other gay men, utilize, or used to access Backpage, Craigslist, or other hookup sites for dating, random sex or companionship. It has been the iconic staple for the gay community along when print ads would list men seeking men columns. Basically, it was the only outlet that allowed consenting adults to engage in not only sexual activity but a way for gay men to meet other gay men. However, male escorts and other sex workers were scattered in between the websites blending in with ads and conservatives sought a chance to forever close access to one part of the gay community. Overnight, Backpage, Craigslist, and countless other gay sites went dark due to government intervention due in part to FOSTA.

I used to laugh at the notion back in the 90’s when conservative lawmakers would make noise about “The Gay Agenda.” Strange that I never got my copy, but all the conservative lawmakers did? Despite the passage of gay marriage and specific LGBT equalities I always felt that the conservative agenda is to turn back the clock in the gay community. FOSTA, religious freedoms by the U.S. Supreme Court, repeal of transgendered in the military, the sex offender registry used as a weapon for allegations 30 years old or older, rollback of adoption laws, and countless other should be enough proof that anti-LGBT legislation is coming and shifting gay cultures. States with conservative lawmakers are rushing bills through committee quickly. While the nation is focused on Trump’s twitter feed legislation is blindsiding many LGBT Americans.

Personally, what two consenting adults do in the privacy of his/her bedroom is no business of mine. Other nations continue to engage in legalized prostitution or apps without government oversight, but they too are experiencing influence from not conservatives, but liberals that fought for pro-sex laws. Liberals in the German legislature seek to end legalized prostitution referring to #metoo influences and other fear-based and unfounded tactics. German conservatives surprisingly are against criminalizing or making sex worker registration more difficult. German conservatives cite that creating additional bureaucratic measures may begin pushing sex workers in the shadows similar to failed American sex culture. At least the Germans appear to be on the right strategy. Other nations don’t seem to be glued to mobile phone apps for gay hookups or dating, but it is a resource most accepted by the LGBT community. Its public policies and attitudes are far more accepting of the LGBT communities than the United States. In fact, many gay clubs continue to operate robustly allowing a healthy mixture of LGBT allies or the curious to enter its realm thanks primarily in part of sites such as Craigslist, Backpage, and other former websites affected by FOSTA.

Gay bars and gay dance clubs in America are closing based on an aging gay population leaving many young gay/bi men without places to call its own. It appears that neighborhood gyms are the newest substitute in gay meetings and hookups. Gay men are resorting to phone apps such as Tinder, Surge, Jack’d, Grindr, Scruff, and others. While that may appear okay to some, it provides a scary territory to LGBT members because of safety concerns.  However, when will these apps be affected by FOSTA and be taken offline leaving fewer choices? The conservative anti-gay agenda seems entirely clear to rid of LBGT communities, web access, bars, clubs, and apps once again isolating human beings from equal access. If the LGBT community isn’t careful, it may end up playing Semisonic’s “Closing Time” for any gay-themed establishment well before the end of the Trump-Pence presidency.

View from the Gloryhole

Growing up I learned a lot about having to cover for whom I really was. Thirty or so years ago there was no such thing as the LGBT community in the public view. In fact, merely saying that you were gay, lesbian, bisexual or experimenting could be the difference between life and death. During that same period, I witnessed witchhunts in the military, at school, in the church, and community of those that didn’t fit the straight model citizen approach. Any person not straight or straight-acting learned quickly to lie or make up any excuse from being identified as gay, lesbian, or any deviation from the public norm. Back then it was a matter of pure survival in a world filled with machoism and legalized beatings based on fear.

 

As I grew older, I began to find people somewhat like myself. There was an unwritten and complicated code of “people like us” or “friends of Dorothy” styled references that would ultimately allow ones guard to be let down for a brief moment. That guard was immediately restored if something traumatic or raised suspicion within the close-knit community. It was an era and continues to be, a somewhat traumatic for those raised during a period of pre-LGBT history.

 

As people would let down their guard and become comfortable there were two sets of identities to utilize. One would be your gay friends. The others would be those that would never meet your gay friends – thus the alter-ego of straightness. While songs by the Village People, Soft Cell, Indigo Girls, and Culture Club could let you off the gay hook, one had to be careful not to be singing Madonna loudly “Like A Prayer” or Cher “Believe” with drag styled hand motions. Otherwise, your secret is no longer a secret.

 

While LGBT issues appear to have significantly improved over time so has the opposition that demands nearly criminalizing anything gays have tried to highlight. As the wall of guilt and shame eventually were removed, it was straight people that began to outnumber gay patrons at predominately gay establishments (talk about a confusing time to differentiate who is gay, really gay, with the girlfriend, or secretly wishing they were with a guy instead of the girlfriend, or the dreaded “this is my first time here” liner). Gay marriage finally passed, but straight people are still trying to figure out who is the groom or bride in some weird traditional comparison. Of course, wedding cake makers seem to be devout Christians for some strange reason, and we seem to be living in a world where anyone can wear a rainbow shirt. But that is where the party ends, and queer life goes back to being really gay leaving the community divided, displaced and minimalized.

 

I watched a world where AIDS was joked upon by President Reagan and fear from contracting HIV was similar to blaming the cat for the spread of the plaque. Today HIV testing is buried and defunded yet infected rates continue to climb. Hate crimes are still relevant today with gay club shootings or random killing acts that capture the headlines of the evening news that are quickly forgotten. The George Michael days of public restroom cruising, Gloryhole arcades (yes, they called them arcades), exclusive LGBT hookup sites such as Craigslist, Men4RentNow, and many others have been forcibly removed because of claims of possible sex trafficking. Much has changed over the past decade. What has incredibly changed the most is how LGBT issues and rights are once again becoming a campaign moment that somehow “the gays are responsible for terrorists” ideology? Despite all the religious-right talk, there is very little of people actually countering to argue back. Keeping silent is pretty much just as the same as agreeing with the rhetoric.

 

There was a time were acquiring condoms, birth-control, or other sex-related items primarily came from people in the LGBT community – sometimes for free to promote safe and responsible sex values. However, today sex education is removed from the educational curriculum or most meeting establishments. Those free condoms, birth control or other informational handouts have been criminalized leaving all communities vulnerable.  Once again, the gays seem to take the blame.

 

One upside to the gay community is that more men are allowing themselves to become a bit more promiscuous because of the #metoo movement. If you think your man is over at a buddies house watching the game? – Think again! Some men are actually fearful of engaging in conversations with the opposite sex or having one night stands for fear of being sexist or possible false accusations. Therefore, the gay community is once again open for business to take care of what straights usually fuck up in the first place. But without condoms, education, and a way to become connected with a buddy system so will the rise of hate crimes, STD’s, false allegations, sex crimes, and other violence will undoubtedly begin to trickle again making the gay community the villain in these cases. That’s just how politicians want to paint that canvas – but the gays know how to add vivid color!

 

It is funny that history always seems to know exactly how to repeat itself. There are no real official spokespeople for the LGBT community. There are many advocates and high profile celebrities. But rarely will that celebrity status be used unless it benefits that individual. I don’t visualize Tim Cook, Peter Thiel, or Lady Gaga gunning for LGBT issues – unless of course, it profits their wallets. The new gay has become the professional and closeted gay saying, “what happens in my bedroom is none of your business!’  That may be true and valid, but society has a vulgar and graphic way of depicting any image it wishes to pursue. The facts remain that children that are LGBT are usually subject to abuse, homelessness, depression, PTSD, living two lifestyles, and disconnected from mainstream society. The programs once with highlight and mantra of the LGBT community has become an app or some weird paid online subscription trying to fix someone that isn’t quite yet broken but looking resources.

 

The gay bars, bookstores, gloryholes, dance clubs, anthem icon singers, and follies of gaydom seems to finally have ended. A few remaining protestors continue to fight to be the instantaneous posterchild for fifteen minutes of fame before becoming the lightning rod of the Republican party or religious-right groups. Perhaps we need to bring those infamous Gloryholes back? It could stimulate the economy and excite a few returning Republican Party members and religious-right patrons- as they were the most significant contributors to the Gloryhole society.